Humor is an excellent ice-breaker, as long as it's used appropriately.
(You all KNOW better than to tell a political, religious, or sexual joke
if you're not absolutely sure it will be welcome ... right?)
The following are
samples of actual signs that I found on several different "joke
lists." While they're funny in and of themselves, read them with an
eye to using them ON a business card. You could also SAY a funny line like
this as you give out your card.
-
Sign at truck
stop café reads: Eat here diet home.
-
On the side of a
plumber's van: A straight flush is better than a full house.
-
In a dentist
office: Be true to your teeth or they will be false to you.
-
On a restaurant:
Try our fish just for the halibut.
-
Church sign: To
remove worry wrinkles, get your faith lifted.
-
Gym: Merry
Fitness and a Happy New Rear!
-
Car Lot: The best
way to get on your feet ... Miss a car payment.
-
Maternity Clothes
Shop: We are open on Labor Day.
-
Outside a country
shop in West Virginia: We buy junk and sell antiques.
-
On septic tank
pumping truck: You dump it, we pump it!
-
Septic tank
service truck: We'll take crap from anyone!
-
In front of a car
wash: If you can't read this, it's time to wash your car.
-
In a Texas
funeral parlor: Ask about our layaway plan.
-
In the front yard
of a funeral home: Drive carefully, we'll wait. (also seen on back of coffin company truck)
-
On an
electrician's truck: Let us remove your shorts.
-
Outside a
radiator repair shop: Best place in town to take a leak.
-
At an
optometrist's office: If you don't see what you're looking for, you've
come to the right place.
-
On a
taxidermist's window: We really know our stuff.
-
On a butcher's
window: Let me meat your needs.
-
Outside a muffler
shop: No appointment necessary. We'll hear you coming.
-
In a dry
cleaner's emporium: Drop your pants here.
-
In a
veterinarian's waiting room: Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!
-
At the electric
company: We would be delighted if you send in your bill.
However, if you don't, you will be.
-
Outside a Hotel:
Help! We need inn-experienced people.
-
At an Auto Body
Shop: May we have the next dents?
-
In a Podiatrist's
window: Time wounds all heels.
-
On another
Butcher's window: Pleased to meat you.
-
At a Used Car
Lot: Second Hand cars in first crash condition.
-
Plumber: We
repair what your husband fixed.
-
Trucks of a local
plumbing company in NE Pennsylvania: Don't sleep with a drip. Call
your plumber.
-
Pizza shop
slogan: 7 days without pizza makes one weak.
-
At a tire shop in
Milwaukee: Invite us to your next blowout.
-
Door of a plastic
surgeons office: Hello, can we pick your nose?
-
Sign at the
psychic's Hotline: Don't call us, we'll call you.
-
At a Towing
Company: We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows.
-
In a counselors
office: Growing old is mandatory, growing wise is optional.
