Humorous Tag Lines

Have you ever seen funny slogans on business cards, or been given a business card with a tagline that made you smile?

Humor is an excellent ice-breaker, as long as it’s used appropriately. (You all KNOW better than to tell a political, religious, or sexual joke if you’re not absolutely sure it will be welcome … right?)

Funny Slogans You Can Imitate for YOUR Business Cards

The following are samples of funny slogans or signs that I found on several different “joke lists.” While they’re funny in and of themselves, read them with an eye to using them ON a business card. You could also SAY a funny line like this as you give out your card.

  • Sign at truck stop café reads: Eat here diet home.
  • On the side of a plumber’s van: A straight flush is better than a full house.
  • In a dentist office: Be true to your teeth or they will be false to you.
  • Restaurant: Try our fish just for the halibut.
  • Church sign: To remove worry wrinkles, get your faith lifted.
  • Gym: Merry Fitness and a Happy New Rear!
  • Car Lot: The best way to get on your feet … Miss a car payment.
  • Maternity Clothes Shop: We are open on Labor Day.
  • Outside a country shop in West Virginia: We buy junk and sell antiques.
  • On septic tank pumping truck: You dump it, we pump it!
  • Septic tank service truck: We’ll take crap from anyone!
  • Car wash: If you can’t read this, it’s time to wash your car.
  • In a Texas funeral parlor: Ask about our layaway plan.
  • Funeral home: Drive carefully, we’ll wait.
  • On an electrician’s truck: Let us remove your shorts.
  • Outside a radiator repair shop: Best place in town to take a leak.
  • At an optometrist’s office: If you don’t see what you’re looking for, you’ve come to the right place.
  • On a taxidermist’s window: We really know our stuff.
  • On a butcher’s window: Let me meat your needs.
  • Outside a muffler shop: No appointment necessary. We’ll hear you coming.
  • In a dry cleaner’s emporium: Drop your pants here.
  • In a veterinarian’s waiting room: Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!
  • At the electric company: We would be delighted if you send in your bill.  However, if you don’t, you will be.
  • Outside a Hotel: Help! We need inn-experienced people.
  • At an Auto Body Shop: May we have the next dents?
  • In a Podiatrist’s window: Time wounds all heels.
  • On another Butcher’s window: Pleased to meat you.
  • At a Used Car Lot: Second Hand cars in first crash condition.
  • Plumber: We repair what your husband fixed.
  • Trucks of a local plumbing company in NE Pennsylvania: Don’t sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.
  • Pizza shop slogan: 7 days without pizza makes one weak.
  • At a tire shop in Milwaukee: Invite us to your next blowout.
  • Door of a plastic surgeons office: Hello, can we pick your nose?
  • Sign at the psychic’s Hotline: Don’t call us, we’ll call you.
  • At a Towing Company: We don’t charge an arm and a leg. We want tows.
  • In a counselors office: Growing old is mandatory, growing wise is optional.